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Those are the 3 phrases that come to mind when I think of intention. And boy do I try to live intentionally. I even chose a name for my blog / business/ alter ego etc with the word INTENT. So why do I feel ill-equipped to write about intention?!? I have all the planners, techniques, vision, and skills to live a life well-planned. I have mastered and honed the Home CEO, Working Mom, and Grown Adult roles so much so that I even write blog posts dedicated to living with intention, being more productive, and living your best life. And then I consider the best days and moments I have experienced. They weren’t planned or perfect. Most of them were a result of unforeseen circumstance. I’m living in a state that never crossed my mind prior to my dad losing his job in 1994 when I was a freshman in college. I’m a mother to a child I never knew existed until he was six. I have AMAZING friends, patients, and coworkers I never would have met had my first marriage not ended. And I’m married to a man who gave me 2 gorgeous, smart, funny, loving boys that never would have known my name if all my plans had worked out. Those that know us would agree we would probably have never been in the same room if it weren’t for someone somewhere creating the internet. So I will continue to plan, manifest, set goals, and make to-do lists. It makes me happy and I like to think I’m in control. Then I will watch some of it unfold, unravel, get messy, hurt, and burn - I will be better, wiser, and more compassionate in the aftermath of my intention. ❤️
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These are a few of my favorite things... (insert Sound of Music Julia Andrews here)
Safety 1st AutoSensor Nightlight ($13 for a 2-pack on Amazon)- these stay dark when the lights are on and automatically light up when the room goes dark- they never get hot! These were in a condo we rented last year and I researched to buy them for my own home! I LOVE THEM! Erin Condren Sticker Album- $10 on Amazon, or you can use my EC Affiliate Link to shop more of her products. This album is 24 pages and holds 48 pages (or more) of stickers. I place my most-used planner stickers on there so I can throw this album in a bag for the coffee shop or the ball field.
Singing my wake up song 🎵 to 2 sleepy-eyed, bed-head boys.
Rocking a baby in a soft onesie wrapped snugly and tenderly in a blanket. Seeing my parents’ puppies run towards me with wild abandon as I beckon “hey, Littttttttle Boys!!!!” A brand new journal tight at the spine, crisp at each paper edge, blank as a fresh-fallen snow. A mug full of barely-used dual-tip markers with a coffee-infused brain and 20 minutes to doodle. That bass drum, the high hat, a sexy snare, a rumble from a bass guitar, melody from those 🎹 keys, and a voice belting out pain or ecstasy in an outdoor venue. Yes 🙌🏻 I will and I want more! 100k of us squeezed together, sweating, smiling, ❤️ racing, waving shakers, roaring as a collective animal as one 20-something runs up and launches that 🏈 into a fall Saturday reunion of college powerhouse rivals. Inching into my ✈️ seat and opening a magazine I will never read on my way to something new. And this. Writing. Typing. Dreaming. Reflecting. Lamenting. Laughing. Crying. Smiling. Feeling. This gives me hope. Meeting you and considering one of my words might tug at your ❤️ or muster a grin. That gives me hope. As I sit outside to write, I hear birds around me, the gentle breeze in the trees, and squirrels rustling through the leaves. It is a gorgeous late summer afternoon, and I can feel the energy of fall from my toes up through my body and into my smile. Fall is my absolute favorite time of year, only one tiny degree above Christmas. I see a blue-tailed lizard shuffle along my patio and I notice a few dry leaves dancing from the treetops to the creek bed.
God didn't make me to live inside. He didn't make me to sit still or stay in one place either. I have lived in 4 states, multiple homes, and I think I'm on my third lifetime (or so it feels most days). Sometimes, when I'm quiet... when IT is quiet.. I reflect on all I have seen, witnessed, felt, loved, lost, and won. Certain flashes in time come to me, waves of emotions, smells, sounds, and FEELINGS. When I'm quiet. When my day is quiet. When I'm not moving or doing or thinking...
Bonus question: what can I do to help? I feel so helpless!
***as always, consult your PCP for your healthcare. I’m trying to raise awareness. Let’s not bicker and judge over vaccine status. Let’s educate ourselves and let’s come together to get out of this public health crisis!!!***
When to test after known exposure (kid, adult, masked, unmasked, vax, unvax, PLEASE READ):
⁃ are the CDC recs confusing? Yes ⁃ Is your school or work throwing out different recs? Yes ⁃ I say this is when our common sense 🧠 MUST play a role ⁃ This is Sally 🙋🏼♀️ and she was around 🤒Bobby who tested + for 🦠Covid ⁃ I don’t care about Bobby’s 🤒 vax status but I do want to know Sally’s 🙋🏼♀️ ⁃ I want to know if 🙋🏼♀️ & 🤒 were unmasked and close to each other for longer than 15 minutes or if something “crazy” happened like 🤒 sneezed or they 🤝 or they were 🍷🍽 together. Maybe they LOL’d next to each other or hugged. How close were they? Maybe they cried together at a funeral? ⁃ Next I want to know if 🙋🏼♀️ has any fever, cough, chills, body aches, sinus congestion, sore throat, loss of taste or smell, joint or muscle aches, diarrhea, nausea, abdominal pain, headache, shortness of breath, wheezing, chest tightness, confusion, or dizziness when standing and if/when she does, I’m testing her regardless of vax status. If neg, I’m testing her again in 2 days. Meanwhile I’m keeping her home because she is symptomatic. ⁃ The only reason I’m testing 🙋🏼♀️ if she never shows symptoms would be: ⁃ the exposure was risky based on above mentioned factors, or 🙋🏼♀️ has someone who is immunocompromised, elderly, young, or unhealthy that she sees regularly ⁃ Work / school requires it ⁃ Peace of mind ⁃ I would test at day 3 or 5 or both ⁃ I’m seeing exposed folks (symptomatic and asymptomatic) test too soon. Then test + a few days later. This burdens the testing sites. So wait until day 3-5 if you can! ***as always, consult your PCP for your healthcare. I’m trying to raise awareness. Let’s not bicker and judge over vaccine status. Let’s educate ourselves and let’s come together to get out of this public health crisis!!!*** What can I do at home for Covid? 1. Zoom with your provider 2. Walk around as much as you can- covid causes blood clots 3. Lay on your belly when you’re resting, not necessarily when asleep. We are proning Covid patients (placing them on their belly) even when they are on the ventilator to help move mucus / fluid and drain the lungs. 4. Hot steamy showers. Even if you don’t feel good enough to shower, sit in your smallest bathroom with the steam running to help open up the lungs. If you feel lightheaded though, stop. 5. Hydrate hydrate hydrate - covid is an inflammatory virus and hydration is key! 6. Monitor your pulse and oxygen levels as I mentioned yesterday. 7. What has fallen out of favor / lacked statistical backup and/or caused harm: ivermectin, oral steroids prior to hospitalization, hydroxychloroquine (Plaquenil), unnecessary antibiotics 8. Mucinex, zinc, Vit C, Vit D, Singulair (it’s Rx though) are all in the grey zone- I don’t think they’ll hurt you but they may not keep you out of the hospital. 9. Finish out your quarantine please and thank you. 10. Chest percussion- look it up on YouTube How do I know if it’s Delta? 1. Big testing centers are batch testing swabs for variants and extrapolating that data to identify geographic variant trends. Your local urgentcare is not. 2. Whatever the variant, we treat based on symptom severity and delta may look good on you and horrible on Sally. Alpha (the original variant) may have put me in the hospital but barely slowed Steve down. 3. I equate it to flu A and B which are always swabbed and tested together each year. Every year I hear “oh Flu B is way worse than A. I’m so sorry you have B.” Etc etc etc when patients’ flu courses can vary regardless of the strain. 4. Anecdotally, my zoom covid visits with this wave seem different than in 2020. Less fevers. Less complaints of crippling headaches. Less loss of taste and smell. More dizziness & confusion (likely from low oxygen levels). Similar diarrhea complaints. Worse shortness of breath and chest tightness. Way more trips to the hospital and ICU. . My only vent-survivor told me all of a sudden they just Could Not Breathe. I should add this person is under 40 years old and is (or was) healthy. 5. Speaking of strains, did you know the Gardasil vaccine protects against 9 strains of HPV? Did you know Prevnar13 protects against (you guessed it) 13 strains of pneumonia? Strains have been around forever as have vaccines yet sudden interest persists. Just educating- no judgment on vaccine choices. I’m too tired. How many times can a child under age 12 have Covid? Will they develop immunity? Great question. I’ve seen twice so far and I expect more. Their bodies should be developing antibodies but no children have volunteered for my quantitative antibody study yet. Stay tuned. How soon should I get my vaccine after I have Covid? I’m recommending one month not 90 days IF you’re truly feeling better. Ask your PCP as they know your health situation. If I’m + today, symptoms resolve in 2 weeks, and then I’m + in 4 weeks, is it a reinfection or residual positive from original infection? I would ask if you ever had a negative test. If you did, maybe it is a re-infection but if you did not, I know we saw some folks stay + for 6 weeks or more in 2020. ***as always, consult your PCP for your healthcare. I’m trying to raise awareness. Let’s not bicker and judge over vaccine status. Let’s educate ourselves and let’s come together to get out of this public health crisis!!!***
I just had a funny thought as I sipped my coffee. I wish I had read this article 19 years ago in my first few weeks of NP school. I wonder if I would have kept going to class? Probably... knowing me. I'm always trying to prove somebody wrong. Alright, alright, I'm about to let you all in on a BIG secret! Those who love me, and especially those who live with me know all of these truths, but I bet many of you are about to lose all your enamor for your health care provider. I am going to tell you about the daily life of a family nurse practitioner working in primary care. In essence, my day can be broken down into a few "sessions" or time periods.
Let me laugh with another sip of coffee real quick before I proceed.
Going back to my original "dreams" of working as an NP, did any of it come true?
Check out these posts from my fellow Hope*Writers for our monthly writing challenge. This month's theme was "daily": Oh, I Try by Jessica Weaver www.rootedunrooted.com/blog/oh-i-try Kids Sleep Meditation: 6 Daily Practice Dos and Don’ts by Ashley Olivine louvaria.com/kids-sleep-meditation/ Lessons from Daily Bread by Dianne Vielhuber simplewordsoffaith.com/2021/09/01/lessons-from-daily-bread/ Daily Conversations with God by Sharla Hallett www.sharlahallett.com/daily-conversations-with-god/ As a family nurse practitioner, I see moms, dads, grandparents, and kids every day in my office. One of the most common questions I encounter with my pediatric patients comes from frustrated, defeated parents or grandparents. HOW CAN I GET MY CHILD TO EAT VEGETABLES? Here is the tried-and-true method I've used with my own children to get them to eat vegetables (and other healthy foods):
Let's discuss each tip in more detail. There are some things you need to know before you begin.
If you are reading this article thinking that I am judging you, I am not by any means. I think all mothers and fathers are doing the best they can when they can where they are in life. You decided that you want to work on Johnny's diet, and you looked for help. I decided I could not lie to you and give you what you wanted to read. You need the truth! These tips have worked in my house and in HUNDREDS of homes of my patients throughout my career. Good luck Mom or Dad! You can do this!!! I am cheering for you! I'm waving broccoli and carrots at you from Georgia!
How to be the most productive on your day off (when you have to run errands): 10 Pro Tips!8/11/2021
We have all been there. We have an unexpected day off and we try to cram 497,632 things to do in that one day. That day comes and goes like the wind and maybe only two things were accomplished. We feel like a failure, and we decide we are a lazy blob of a human. None of this is true.
Here are 10 pro tips when running errands and being productive on your day off:
Let's take a deep dive into each of these pro tips.
I encourage you to try these on your next day off and share your success stories (or epic fails- we can laugh or cry with you) in the comments below. Please know that I still have wasted days off, and that's okay! I'm learning in my forties that some days are meant to be wasted. (insert sunshine, beach music, and a cool breeze here)
First of all- this morning was a disaster, so I thought this might be a good topic for a blog post. Since my oldest is now 19 and out of the house, I cannot claim to be a novice at getting children out the door. My youngest is now in fourth grade, so again I should be good at this.
I learned many years ago that mornings and evenings with children can make or break any parent's heart. All kids out the door with teeth brushed, hair combed, deodorant on, lunch in hand, and backpacks on equals home run, grand slam, touchdown. If either or both parent makes it out the door with work lunch, work bag, clothes, jewelry, watch, phone, brain cells, positive attitude, AND shoes--- well you might as well say we have won the lottery. The secret to these success stories (which let’s be honest are few and far between for most of us) is having a morning and an evening routine. I know, I know, everyone and their mother, brother, sister, aunt, uncle, cousin is online touting about elaborate morning and evening routines that are super unrealistic for a single person much less for a family with multiple children. My goal in writing this article is to tell you the absolute truth: the cold, hard, ugly, sometimes-hilarious, often meltdown-provoking truth. The truth is that getting kids out the door is hard. It also takes practice and patience. The following tips will help you get your kids out the door:
The 15 minute buffer: Parents and kids alike need a 15 minute buffer every morning. This is a fact, and I’m not sure why it is true, but it is true. If everyone needs to leave by 7:15 AM , we ALL need to mentally think 7 AM. Allowing that 15 minute buffer reduces anxiety, rushing, attitudes, and raised voices. I personally use the 15 minute buffer always on all days just to reduce my own anxiety since being late provokes panic for me. Have a dedicated spot for backpacks, shoes, and lunchboxes: All five members of our household have always taken their lunch to work or school. This saves money and is better for our physical health. We have a dedicated spot for lunchboxes so that packing lunches is easier. I asked my husband to install hooks in our hallway between the garage and laundry room for backpacks since the layout of our house does not lend itself to a mud room or drop off bench area. The backpack / hoodie hooks have been a game changer in our household. Similarly, shoes are deposited in a designated space as we enter our home. This prevents all the “where are my shoes!?!“ screams in the mornings. When the kids get off the bus or my husband and I get home from work, things aren’t strewn across the kitchen. They go where they belong. Use a timer: I use a the timer on my watch for several things every single morning.
Set expectations ahead of time: My kids know that their homework must be done before bed and not the morning of school. Unless we have a late ballgame or rehearsal and they are just exhausted, they know that they are not allowed to do homework in the morning. This prevents any last minute “mom I have to do this worksheet real quick“ debacles that can derail any smooth morning. My children also know that they eat breakfast at home at the table every morning, and they must allow time to eat in their schedule. They will not be eating a pop tart or breakfast bar on the bus. Whatever expectations you have for your family, I encourage you to make those known well ahead of time and be consistent. Consistency is key. Remain calm: This tip is probably the most important tip but also the most comical in my opinion. I can definitely say this is the hardest one for me to follow. While I am naturally a morning person and usually a calm person, my aforementioned anxiety that stems from being late causes me to get easily flustered if the kids go off the rails. It never fails that the dog won’t go outside or the milk gets spilled or the backpack won’t unzip or mom forgot the applesauce on the click list. These things happen. Since we have the 15 minute buffer, it is best to remain calm and take a few deep breaths before unloading every thought and frustration onto our children. We love our children and our spouse and our dog. Repeat that three times LOL. Weekly habits that make daily routines flow smoothly:
Check schedules every night: I have used a planner my entire life. I am a planning guru. However, when work is crazy and kids' schedules are busy and homework abounds, I sometimes forget to look at my planner. This is never good. Whether you use a digital or a paper planner, it is easy to dismiss a digital reminder or leave a beautifully decorated planner unopened. Check the planner. Check it again. Every night. Charge all the things:
Morning routine for parents:
Evening routine for parents:
Top 10 ways to make your commute more productive:
I have been commuting for 11 years. Commuting WITH children was horrible, and I do not want to discuss it. However, if you have the luxury of commuting solo (if you have to commute, I think solo is probably the most enjoyable unless you have a great commuter group or partner), then the above tips can really help make your commute more productive.
Early morning in a hotel room in Birmingham, AL and it’s already scorching outside. The boys are asleep, but I’m still basking in the glory of seeing an old friend last night. We picked up as if we were just sitting next to each other in AP English, but in reality, it has been TEN years since I’ve seen her face and hugged her tightly.
With social media, one can “feel” like we know what’s going on in each other’s lives, but nothing replaces uninterrupted conversation and rehashing old memories. When you’re 45 and you see someone who knew you at 11 in that awkward braces-for-her, round-thick-glasses-for-me phase, any ego or feeling of adultness goes out the window. We saw each other’s hearts get broken and dreams get lived out. I twirled a flag in a band she led onto the field, and she had to witness all my annoying academic dominance in high school. Can you believe she actually apologized for something she said that was cruel to me 30 years ago? She is one of the most beautiful loving souls I have ever known! Her faith and love for God has always brought me to her like a moth to a flame; she has been a safe space for me to express my faith. Why do we all hold onto old garbage? I do it too! We all do. This time our conversation covered motherhood, marriage, aging parents, losing parents, our nursing careers, and each of our unwanted entrances into the world of rheumatology. Just like in high school, we laughed and smiled about our daily quest to do the best we can and survive the icky parts of relationships, parenting, and work. Both a little wiser, and me definitely a lot humbler (her too, I’m sure), it was refreshing to be REAL for a few hours with my friend who saw me with 2” high bangs and overalls with one strap unbuttoned. You can’t lie to a friend who has seen all that. |