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I love planning. Lots and lots of planning. I wish I could say I have time to do all the planning I want to do, but let's be honest, I waste time with Netflix and TikTok instead. That's okay, though. Sometimes that "wasting time" is our mind, body, and spirit recovering from all the daily input and stressors. But every year around this time, I go full-speed PLANNING MODE to prep for a new year. I have found it both helpful and invigorating to plan for a new year with new opportunities. Fresh starts are endless, necessary, and exciting. Please enjoy my top 10 planning hacks:
To further understand what each one of these hacks entails, let's dig a little deeper:
I hope this content gives you ideas and energy towards the art of planning as it affects your life. Some of my best days were planned. Some were not. And that's okay. Listen to your body and follow its lead. Your body knows what plans feel good for you. Godspeed. ☀️ Please support my fellow hope*writers by reading their work based on the prompt word PLAN: A New Plan, Again by Ashley Olivine https://www.ashleyolivine.com/a-new-plan-again/ A New Year Plan by Regina Marcazzo-Skarka https://reginamarcazzoskarka.com/2023/01/01/january-1-2023-a-new-year-plan/
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I love Christmas. I know for some the holidays are hard. Very hard. And as I get older, they are harder for me too. But I still have that child-like wonder and love for the holiday season. And I hope by traveling this list with me, you'll find a little whimsy inside your soul too.
Time? Energy? Apathy? We all juggle these 3 elements every day, especially if we have children. Even my friends and family that don't have children tell me that they struggle with the same roadblocks that slow them down and cause them to feel unproductive. Personally, I just went through a season of rest, so I will be the FIRST to tell you that being productive and hustling 24/7 will break you in the end. If, however, you feel ready and able to tackle more in less time, I hope these tips can get you started or at least give you a few ideas. Happy hustling! (in moderation!!!) Here are my top 10 productivity hacks in no particular order:
It is worthwhile to discuss each of these 10 productivity hacks in more detail. Let's dive in!
I hope you have found these tips and tricks to be useful and helpful! Again, do not beat yourself up if you are not being productive 24/7. Rest is SO important and having seasons to lay low and recharge are necessary. Listen to your body. Follow your energy. Godspeed. P.S. Comment below if you try any of these or are already doing some of them! I love interacting with my readers! I have been packing for the beach for over 20 years now. I certainly was not as pack-savvy my first 5-10 trips as I am now. These are my BEST TIPS for beach packing if you are driving to the beach.
see list of supplies I keep year-round in my cabin / beach box ⬆️⬆️⬆️ Beach Food / Condo List:
Beach clothes / other necessities list:
What goes in our cooler(s) for the ride to the beach:
What we buy once we are there:
I'm typing this from Orange Beach.
I hope you found these lists inclusive and helpful. May all your beach trips be smooth sailing. 🏖 Godspeed. Monthly meal planning has taken me YEARS to develop. One thing to note is that there are 3 adults rotating the cooking in my family. My parents live 2 doors down from us and we decided many years ago that it was easier to feed 7 than 2 (for them) and that mom didn't mind cooking for 7 twice a week if it meant she and dad would be fed by us several nights per week. Some weeks that looks different. Since my husband and I both commute about an hour each way to our jobs, and he works night shift, my mom may have to cook 3 times some weeks. Kids' sports and school activities can also affect our cooking rotation. Let's look at monthly meal planning with a few good tips or rules to get you started:
Now let's look at each question in more detail:
Pro tip: track what you are currently eating for a week or two as you are mentally preparing yourself to begin this process. Just like "getting on a budget" - it is extremely helpful to see what you are currently eating as a family. If you are eating out 5 out of 7 nights, it is unfair to expect you will start cooking 5 out of 7 nights immediately. That is a recipe for disaster! Pun intended! Maybe try cooking 3 nights at first. START SMALL! Good luck and just remember: it doesn't have to be fancy, it just has to be planned. If you are new to my page or new to baseball in general, please read my 15 THINGS I WISH I KNEW AS A FIRST-TIME BASEBALL MOM. After writing that lengthy post, I decided to give my travel baseball tips separately since recreational baseball and travel baseball really are two different animals. My top 10 Travel Baseball Tips for New Travel Baseball Moms:
Let's break down each one of these tips into more detail:
I hope you found this post helpful. We are entering our third season of travel ball, and I am still learning all the ins and outs. One other tip I did not mention is to never burn bridges. You never know when your player may play with a former teammate or coach again, and keeping options open for your child will always be in his best interest. Baseball really is like family. We all have a crazy Uncle Larry (sorry to any Larrys out there), but we still love Uncle Larry if he has the team's and the players' best interests at heart. ❤️ *** Disclaimer: I did not mention the First Aid Kit that I have stocked and loaded since I'm the team nurse / NP. I may do an entire post on it since I have tweaked those supplies MANY times during our 11-12 seasons of baseball now! Some of the other basics like sunscreen, sunglasses, chairs, tents, blankets, umbrellas, etc are all covered in my original post "15 beginner baseball mom must-knows" linked below. It can start any day, any time, anywhere. It can begin without warning. The overwhelm. It's like a net that covers me and I struggle to break free. Whenever I feel my heart start to race and my mind going in a million different directions, I know it’s time to do a brain dump. This often happens when I’m driving or in the shower or - even less convenient- when I put my head on the pillow at night. It is very tempting to let those thoughts go, but I have learned to capture them when I can. If I am in bed and the lights are off, I will grab my phone and voice text whatever is in my mind into the notes section of my phone. If there is a reminder I need to set, then I do that in the reminder app that comes standard on an iPhone. For those of you who are not tech savvy but you have an iPhone, you can use Siri to set a reminder or to create an event in your calendar. If lights are still on, I often jot it down on the notepad I keep next to my bed. I have the kind of brain that remembers better if my hand physically writes it down. This is why I still use a paper planner in 2022. If I am driving, I use Apple CarPlay and Siri to do what I mentioned above. I talk into the notes section of my phone or set reminders or create events... all hands-free with my steering wheel and my iPhone. I do not hate technology at all in this capacity. If I am in the shower, I could still use Siri, but she usually doesn’t understand me over the shower. In that situation, I just write down as much as I can remember as soon as I step out of the shower. Yes, I keep a notepad and pens in my top bathroom drawer. I am THAT person. Speaking of the shower, I try not to think of things. I try to use the shower for mindfulness. Mindfulness sounds fancy and woo-woo, but it’s really just being aware of your body in the moment. One example is thinking “I feel the hot water touch the back of my head. It is running down my back and onto the shower floor. I see the water pooling at my feet. I hear the water as it hits the tile. I taste the toothpaste minty and clean in my mouth. I smell the shampoo I am rubbing into my hair. I am thankful to be alive. Today is a blessing.” If I am practicing mindfulness, it is hard for my thoughts to race elsewhere. photo credit: www.atrapamente.com Another way I center myself is the butterfly tapping technique (linked below), deep breathing exercises (inhale through nose 4 seconds, hold 4 seconds, exhale through mouth 5 seconds). I have used both of these with my entire family when my kids have been off the rails and I needed to get us back on track mentally and emotionally. It takes practice, but it works! Once the kids realized they HAD to do it, they actually got into it. Now, let’s talk about how to actually do a brain dump effectively. I just did one since I was feeling overwhelmed with a busy week ahead, so feel free to reference the picture below. The most effective way I have brain dumped over the years is to separate my random thoughts into categories. I base the categories on grouping similar tasks:
The below picture is just a quick 2-3 minute brain dump. When I use the aforementioned categories, that type of brain dump is a 20-30 minute all-inclusive, major brain dump. Those are the BEST ways to brain dump and my body leans toward doing them on Sundays as I am planning for the week ahead. If I miss a Sunday, my brain and body know it. David Allen is famous for his Getting Things Done book and method. He touts that our brains are not meant to carry information and task lists, they are meant to THINK. That feels very true for me. If my brain is full of a to-do list, I am usually unable to write or create. Once I unload all those tasks I've been juggling on trays in my brain like an overworked restaurant server, I can actually let my brain "breathe" and creativity ensues. I also included a recent monthly meal plan for December 2021. Planning meals one month at a time has GREATLY reduced my overwhelm. I linked the way I actually meal plan down below. Once we have emptied our minds via the brain dump, now we can face the actual overwhelm. Sometimes the overwhelm was just that, carrying too many tasks and to-dos around in our minds. The mental overload of life in 2022. Sometimes it's emotional overwhelm. Grief. Sadness. Loneliness. Disappointment. Regret. Shame. Longing. Anger (which someone somewhere said that Anger is Fear Dressed Up and that resonates with me). Envy. Comparison. Greed. Sometimes it's physical overwhelm. Exhaustion. Physical pain. Illness. Injury. Anxiety or depression manifesting as physical symptoms (headaches, abdominal pain, joint or muscle aches). No matter what TYPE of overwhelm we are feeling, the spiral is the same. Sometimes sleep or a healthy meal can provide relief. Often silence and solitude are the answer for me. Just know that YOU ARE NOT ALONE. I am fighting the fight with you. Godspeed.
So there you have it! All my favorites from February 2022! I hope you find something you like or even just a reminder of something you need or would like to try out. That's why I post my favorites- they are fun and I like reading or watching other people's favorites. Feel free to leave comments below! I would love to hear from you! My quick money story. Everybody has one, right? Some people are born into money, some are not. Some people make a fantastic income and still struggle to pay their bills. Others make an average income and live comfortably within their means. Not many people talk about money. It's a secret. It now comes and goes in several icons on our devilish palm-sized devices (see my love hate relationship with my phone here). Anyway, my money story goes something like this: - average childhood, that's my parents' story to tell, but I never really felt STRESSED about money as a child and I was taught some good sound financial principles (thanks Mom & Dad) -got into > 40k in debt in my 20's by living above my means, keeping up with the Joneses and making poor financial decisions -spent 4 years of my 30's GETTING OUT OF DEBT which looked like paying $1000 /month towards old credit card debt FOR FOUR YEARS STRAIGHT (ouch!) -now I am in my 40's and focused on saving for retirement, paying our house off, and avoiding unnecessary debts I say all of that to say: I am not certified in anything financial. I have read some books and followed some financial influencers over the years, and I am very entrenched in our family's finances. I am also learning from my retired parents about what it will actually look like to live on a retirement income. I am familiar with Medicare, pensions, social security benefits, Roth IRAs, and 401k/403b plans. I am not a day trader or financial wizard. I'm somewhere in the middle, and I think that is probably where most of my readers are too. I have had to have very frank discussions about money with patients over the years (financial stress can GREATLY affect one's health and cause caregiver strain with children of elderly patients). So I decided to write about it. Part of my passion for writing is speaking the truth and shedding light on everything that is making us all stressed and uncomfortable. Now that you know my purpose for this piece, are you ready??? Let's do this! My 10 smart money tips for anyone, anywhere:
Let's go through each Money Tip in more detail so that we have a better understanding of them.
PRO TIP: The pictures below are just an example of using my banking app to monitor my spending. You can see the pie chart is for ALL of my 2021 spending. Since I don't have a car payment, I divided my auto expenses by 12. That came to around $392. Since I know car insurance makes up around $200 of the $392, I calculated that I am spending around $172 / month on gas. This is just an easy example of using your banking app to see what you are ACTUALLY spending on categories in your budget. What you think you spend and what you actually spend are often 2 very different amounts. So do your research! It costs you nothing to look at your spending and it will give you so much insight to your financial health! I did not write this post to provoke guilt or shame about your spending or finances. I have had 40k+ in debt and I have felt that overwhelming burden. It's just part of my story, and I am no longer ashamed of it.
What does it take to run a household or a life? Why are there so many memes and jokes about "adulting?" Aren't there things we all do every week or are we just wandering through life constantly trying to remember what it is we were supposed to do? It's taken me years and tears, but I finally developed a few systems to decrease my overwhelm. Here is my own personal list of weekly tasks. I don't do these every week, BUT having a list gives me somewhere to start.
I love a good checklist. Give me a task and I will try to complete it. That said, the list above has some nuances and caveats that are worth mentioning to a novice attempting to "get my life together." I did not make that list overnight, AND some of the steps may or may not apply to you. So let's dig deeper!
I know that was a lot of words to describe what sounds like it would be a simple process. It's not simple though, is it? If it were simple, we would all be doing it and no bill would ever be late, no appointment would ever be missed, and no child would ever go to school without their $5 field trip money that was due yesterday. And so I wrote it all down. I still miss things. I don't do this every week, because LIFE. Perfect is a cruel joke and not that fun anyway. So just do what you can and maybe at least one of these tips will bring you a little peace and a little more free time in the end to do what you were called to do. ☀️ I posted this on Instagram in December 2018, so this shows I have been using a weekly review process for years. I like to follow authentic people and my readers might feel the same way. ☀️ Also, in my experience, I can't write or talk about what I don't know about. My 9-year-old though? He can tell the tallest tale you've ever heard! 😜 In order to plan for 2022, I first had to complete my 2021 yearly review. Be sure to block off at least 30 minutes to complete that task. It is a worthy investment of your time. I have detailed each step for the yearly review process here: 2022 planning- what I KNOW for sure is on the books: January
***I did not include my own health appts***. that list is too long 🤪 Once you have crafted your year-at-a-glance, start plugging dates into your Google calendar and/or paper planner. Consider the goals you set during your goal-setting session (my post on goal-setting linked below). Try to plug in some of your goals into your year-at-a-glance during the month in which you think it might occur. Examples include: - Health: run a 5k - go ahead and find a 5k in your area and list it in the month ahead; remind yourself to register in the previous month - Fun: game night with the girls- go ahead and find a Saturday you can host and plug it in your calendar and create the Facebook event so you'll remember to invite people or they can go ahead and save the date - Personal development: book that conference you want to attend, start saving for it, plug it into your calendar, and set a few reminders before the actual conference date, go ahead and ask a friend if you want someone to attend with you -Home: your fence needs to be painted so go ahead and slate the month you plan to do it; plug it into your calendar; get estimates if you're hiring it out or price your own materials if you plan to do it yourself You can see by my rather extensive list that some months are simply TOO BUSY to tackle a home project or Girls Weekend. Looking at your year-at-a-glance in a list format like this is THE BEST way to future-plan in my experience. Calendars are great, but this really shows how crowded some months can be. I can do an entire post on the month of May and its insanity. May and December have become nothing short of a circus for most parents in America, and I happen to have national nurse's day and a child with a birthday that month to boot. Hopefully, this overview of my year-at-a-glance planning technique will give you some clarity for your year ahead. You may skim through my list and think, No Way Jose, I am NOT going to even think about any of that stuff until I need to think about it. As someone who struggles with anxiety, however, I like to know what's ahead of me. Yes, I still have my minutes, hours, days of complete and total overwhelm which end in a long Netflix binge with a bowl of microwave popcorn or some random unnecessary online shopping stint. We each numb in our own ways. 🤪
I encourage you to give this yearly overview planning process a try. 2020 and 2021 were a ball of fear, disappointment, grief, cancelled plans, confused children, learning gaps, and strained marriages and friendships (for many different reasons). We were all cooped up with people we may or may not like doing things we may not have ever done before. We weren't sure who to believe or what to do. I see a light at the end of that horrible tunnel, so maybe a little navigation and forethought will help us all. Godspeed. Part of the reason I keep a planner is because my memory is terrible. Just ask my best friend since third grade. I blame it on nursing and NP school and having to memorize so many drugs and diseases. I also blame it on having lived in four states and meeting several "sets of people" in my lifetime. Anyway, when I sit down to start my year end review, I grab my planner. I repress memories which I am working on in therapy, but I really can’t remember what happened the past year without flipping through each month and glancing at big moments. I am not exactly sure why my brain is like that, but it is and yours may be too? Sometimes my mind is blown when I look at everything that happened in my personal or professional or emotional life in one calendar year. How do we survive with the pace and the demands of the world today? When is enough enough? Everyone I know feels like they’re drowning with all the work deadlines, projects, meetings, kids' activities, sports, and that's not even accounting for the emotional toll the past 2 years have taken on every single one of us. When I look back over 2021 in my own life, the following events come to light:
As I look back over the events of 2021, it often sparks me to plan and reserve trips or experiences for 2022. My manager also loves that I give her my days off for the entire year in December or January. I realize you might not be able to do this, but it actually reduces my anxiety knowing in January when I will be off throughout the year. If I am having an extremely stressful season / week / month, I already know the upcoming days of rest that are scheduled. My patients appreciate it too... less moving and rearranging (sorry for those reading this- 2021 was rough on my schedule!). 🤪 Sitting down and performing a yearly review also gives me reassurance or reminders of certain events I do NOT want to attend or participate in again. It helps me to identify what was life-giving and what was life-draining. That clarity is HUGE. You'll notice I did not list the following (but they all also happened): hurt feelings, miscommunication, personal growth, continued grief, strained conversations, burnout, apathy, frustration, disdain, regret, fear, hopelessness, anger, and anxiety. While I am not listing those publicly, they are named on my heart and mind. Thanks to counseling, I am trying not to wear them inside my body (The Body Keeps The Score by Bessel Van Der Kolk, MD). I am intentionally working to process and let go as I go instead of swallowing or shoving it down, or worse- spewing it out. This is hard work. This is a big deal. So I encourage you as we wrap up 2021 and enter 2022, to sit down and block off a good 30 minutes to yourself. Scroll through your planner or your Google Calendar or your Facebook pictures and think about the past 12 months. What felt good? What felt icky? Who gave you energy when you were around them? Who made you feel bad about yourself? What habits added to your life? What subtracted? Look at your screen time averages on your phone. Maybe set a goal to lower those. A fellow blogger in my writer's group wrote a piece about our children remembering us looking at our phones instead of looking at their faces. LET THAT SINK IN FOR A MINUTE. I may write a piece about goal-setting and planning for the year ahead, but I would be a sham if I told you I set any goals for 2021. I didn't even know I would start writing this year. This nudge just got so big in July that I just started (oh yeah, I forgot our trip to Birmingham this summer). I was in a hotel room in Birmingham with keyed-up pre-teens, a snoring husband (love you babe), and a laptop staring at me. I had to process all this STUFF and it just started. So just start. Even if you only take the next 2-5 minutes to reflect on 2021. I beg of you to do it. So many of us are just sleepwalking through life. Work. Supper. Kids. TV. Bed. Repeat. Weekend. And repeat again. Let us all try some self-evaluation, life-evaluation, emotional-evaluation. What is life-giving and what is life-draining? What brings you joy? The only person keeping me from writing was ME. What will YOU allow yourself to do in 2022? Godspeed. Ah, the age old decision of which planner to buy and use for next year. Planner peeps, can't we all agree that Planner Peace is a unicorn in the world of washi, mildliners, and stickers??? Most of my planner friends have purchased and tried at least 5 planners, maybe 10, before finding 1-3 that even come close to meeting their needs. Let's face it, planner people like perfection and in the planning world, there just isn't ONE product that can meet all of our needs. So... we keep trying things out and find our groove eventually. If you are a beginner planner, I encourage you to watch some YouTube videos, scroll IG or Pinterest, or check out a planning group on Facebook for ideas before you buy ALL the planner goodies and are unhappy. Some quality planners are >$50, so try (at least in your head) before you buy if you can! Using a horizontal layout: Pros:
Using a vertical layout: Pros:
Random pics:
The most important step to beginning a planning routine is like almost any other new habit in life, just BEGIN. Don't be scared to write in your pretty planner. You don't have to use stickers or colored pens or markers. You CAN use white out or a pencil or just scratch through things. It's not rocket science, but it is FUN in many ways. It does give a false sense of control 🤪, and it can give a sense of accomplishment to at least TRY to plan out our lives. I have a $10 off discount code for your first Erin Condren purchase on my Tools page. I've tried and tested almost every planning system out there, so feel free to post any planning questions below. You can also follow me on IG where I post some of my planning dalliances. 📚 Happy Planning! ☀️✍️📝 There are SO many ways to use a daily planner. Over the years, I have tried numerous daily planners: Planner Perfect Traveler's Notebook system, Passion Planner Daily, Erin Condren Daily Petite Planner, bullet journaling, Michael Hyatt's Full Focus Planner, and Emily Ley's Simplified Planner Daily. The 3 that I stuck with the longest are Planner Perfect, Passion Planner, and EC Daily Petite. I really enjoyed bullet journaling, but it seemed to take more time than I currently have available since everything is blank and undated. Planner Perfect is also blank and undated (other than the pre-printed week-at-a-glance and month-at-a-glance in each of her monthly journals), BUT if you receive her monthly subscription box, you'll get 3 coordinating washi tapes for the month and 4 coordinating sticker pages for the month which make it easy to set up your monthly book. I also find it calming and rhythmic to lay down washi and stickers every month in a freshly printed traveler's notebook that I know will change out of my beautiful, rich, fabulously-leather-smelling Coco TN each and every month. It really is like a fresh start and a new beginning each month. There is something to be said for that. ☀️ Ways to use a daily planner (what to write in it):
Using a daily planner may seem cumbersome, time-wasting, like overkill, or even pointless to some. At times, I agree. Other times, however, I feel like I'm in 4th grade again - unable to drive yet- unable to see my friends freely - and full of creative energy and thoughts that need to land somewhere. I have markers, pens, coloring pencils, stamps, washi tape, and a TV with streaming services or Audible with any book I want or a phone with YouTube and AirPods to fill my creative or avoidant needs.
Planning CAN be numbing, and that's okay. I know a 40-something woman decorating paper with stickers is a much healthier outlet than substance abuse or an eating disorder and I do not say that lightly. Addiction is real. Trauma is real. Numbing is real. Self-soothing is real. Finding healthy and safe ways to calm our nervous system can be both life-giving and life-saving. YOU may just like pens and paper. I encourage you to take your planning love for what it is and enjoy it. I never met a dual-tip marker I didn't like. 😜✍️📝🌻
Once you have decided on a planner, you will immediately start thinking of ways to use the Notes Pages in the back of the planner. Below, I show you pages from my own planners over the years. Some of the other ways I have used my notes pages include:
📝 ✍️ Happy planning!!! 📒📚
As a family nurse practitioner, I see moms, dads, grandparents, and kids every day in my office. One of the most common questions I encounter with my pediatric patients comes from frustrated, defeated parents or grandparents. HOW CAN I GET MY CHILD TO EAT VEGETABLES? Here is the tried-and-true method I've used with my own children to get them to eat vegetables (and other healthy foods):
Let's discuss each tip in more detail. There are some things you need to know before you begin.
If you are reading this article thinking that I am judging you, I am not by any means. I think all mothers and fathers are doing the best they can when they can where they are in life. You decided that you want to work on Johnny's diet, and you looked for help. I decided I could not lie to you and give you what you wanted to read. You need the truth! These tips have worked in my house and in HUNDREDS of homes of my patients throughout my career. Good luck Mom or Dad! You can do this!!! I am cheering for you! I'm waving broccoli and carrots at you from Georgia!
How to be the most productive on your day off (when you have to run errands): 10 Pro Tips!8/11/2021
We have all been there. We have an unexpected day off and we try to cram 497,632 things to do in that one day. That day comes and goes like the wind and maybe only two things were accomplished. We feel like a failure, and we decide we are a lazy blob of a human. None of this is true.
Here are 10 pro tips when running errands and being productive on your day off:
Let's take a deep dive into each of these pro tips.
I encourage you to try these on your next day off and share your success stories (or epic fails- we can laugh or cry with you) in the comments below. Please know that I still have wasted days off, and that's okay! I'm learning in my forties that some days are meant to be wasted. (insert sunshine, beach music, and a cool breeze here)
First of all- this morning was a disaster, so I thought this might be a good topic for a blog post. Since my oldest is now 19 and out of the house, I cannot claim to be a novice at getting children out the door. My youngest is now in fourth grade, so again I should be good at this.
I learned many years ago that mornings and evenings with children can make or break any parent's heart. All kids out the door with teeth brushed, hair combed, deodorant on, lunch in hand, and backpacks on equals home run, grand slam, touchdown. If either or both parent makes it out the door with work lunch, work bag, clothes, jewelry, watch, phone, brain cells, positive attitude, AND shoes--- well you might as well say we have won the lottery. The secret to these success stories (which let’s be honest are few and far between for most of us) is having a morning and an evening routine. I know, I know, everyone and their mother, brother, sister, aunt, uncle, cousin is online touting about elaborate morning and evening routines that are super unrealistic for a single person much less for a family with multiple children. My goal in writing this article is to tell you the absolute truth: the cold, hard, ugly, sometimes-hilarious, often meltdown-provoking truth. The truth is that getting kids out the door is hard. It also takes practice and patience. The following tips will help you get your kids out the door:
The 15 minute buffer: Parents and kids alike need a 15 minute buffer every morning. This is a fact, and I’m not sure why it is true, but it is true. If everyone needs to leave by 7:15 AM , we ALL need to mentally think 7 AM. Allowing that 15 minute buffer reduces anxiety, rushing, attitudes, and raised voices. I personally use the 15 minute buffer always on all days just to reduce my own anxiety since being late provokes panic for me. Have a dedicated spot for backpacks, shoes, and lunchboxes: All five members of our household have always taken their lunch to work or school. This saves money and is better for our physical health. We have a dedicated spot for lunchboxes so that packing lunches is easier. I asked my husband to install hooks in our hallway between the garage and laundry room for backpacks since the layout of our house does not lend itself to a mud room or drop off bench area. The backpack / hoodie hooks have been a game changer in our household. Similarly, shoes are deposited in a designated space as we enter our home. This prevents all the “where are my shoes!?!“ screams in the mornings. When the kids get off the bus or my husband and I get home from work, things aren’t strewn across the kitchen. They go where they belong. Use a timer: I use a the timer on my watch for several things every single morning.
Set expectations ahead of time: My kids know that their homework must be done before bed and not the morning of school. Unless we have a late ballgame or rehearsal and they are just exhausted, they know that they are not allowed to do homework in the morning. This prevents any last minute “mom I have to do this worksheet real quick“ debacles that can derail any smooth morning. My children also know that they eat breakfast at home at the table every morning, and they must allow time to eat in their schedule. They will not be eating a pop tart or breakfast bar on the bus. Whatever expectations you have for your family, I encourage you to make those known well ahead of time and be consistent. Consistency is key. Remain calm: This tip is probably the most important tip but also the most comical in my opinion. I can definitely say this is the hardest one for me to follow. While I am naturally a morning person and usually a calm person, my aforementioned anxiety that stems from being late causes me to get easily flustered if the kids go off the rails. It never fails that the dog won’t go outside or the milk gets spilled or the backpack won’t unzip or mom forgot the applesauce on the click list. These things happen. Since we have the 15 minute buffer, it is best to remain calm and take a few deep breaths before unloading every thought and frustration onto our children. We love our children and our spouse and our dog. Repeat that three times LOL. Weekly habits that make daily routines flow smoothly:
Check schedules every night: I have used a planner my entire life. I am a planning guru. However, when work is crazy and kids' schedules are busy and homework abounds, I sometimes forget to look at my planner. This is never good. Whether you use a digital or a paper planner, it is easy to dismiss a digital reminder or leave a beautifully decorated planner unopened. Check the planner. Check it again. Every night. Charge all the things:
Morning routine for parents:
Evening routine for parents:
So, how in the world do I plan meals for an entire month? As I mentioned in my previous post, monthly meal planning has taken me YEARS to develop. One thing to note is that there are 3 adults rotating the cooking in my family. My parents live 2 doors down from us and we decided many years ago that it was easier to feed 7 than 2 (for them) and that mom didn't mind cooking for 7 twice a week if it meant she and dad would be fed by us several nights per week. Some weeks that looks different. Since my husband and I both commute about an hour each way to our jobs, and he works night shift, my mom may have to cook 3 times some weeks. Kids' sports and school activities can also affect our cooking rotation. Let's look at monthly meal planning with a few good tips or rules to get you started:
Now let's look at each question in more detail:
Good luck and just remember:
it doesn't have to be fancy, it just has to be planned. Meal planning changed my life. Just like my pharmacology professor taught me in NP school, I started “slow and low.” By that I mean that I planned a few days at a time. My boys were probably 1, 3, and 11 when I quickly realized everyone wanted to eat every night and I had 2 of the 3 eating regular food. I was commuting 2 hours a day, managing a full panel of family practice patients, and trying to navigate diapers, bottles, potty-training, and 5th grade all at the same time. I was crying frequently and having palpitations on my drive home trying to figure out what was for dinner. I’m not exaggerating, I was a mess and wondered how every other mom could get it all done. Every other mom was smiling on social media and making brownies and family dinners and had clean houses and perfect marriages. I felt like a giant failure. I knew there had to be a better way.
Now that my kids are 9, 11, and 19 I know that all those social media posts I was consuming were (dare I say) a big fat lie. No one has it all or does it all. It is simply not possible. Motherhood, marriage, and career are all extremely demanding and HARD. They each require huge amounts of effort and compromise. Time management and planning can certainly help but managing (and FEEDING) a family in today’s world is tough. Over the years, I’ve gone from planning a few days of suppers to one week at a time to now an entire month at a time. Yes, ONE MONTH at a time. I have been doing it for 8 years, so my monthly meal planning sessions usually take me about an hour. That one hour per month saves me so many panic attacks and profanities. The boys know that meals are posted on the fridge door and they never really complain about what’s for dinner because they know it’s non-negotiable. I will make a separate blog post about the money I have saved by meal planning, but I simply wanted to introduce the concept and the real reasons WHY I started doing it. I didn’t start meal planning because I was an overachiever or planner-extraordinaire. I was a crying, overwhelmed, sleep-deprived, new mom (I inherited my oldest just a year before my first was born) who was desperate for help. Meal planning may not be for you, but if it is- I am here to help. |