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Spring Break. Panama City Beach. 1995. 4 girls and without a care in the world. Bikinis. Coppertone. Alcohol we scrounged up from our older friends. Junk food and rap music mixed with Southern Rock on our 6-disc CD player in our car. No social media. No Life360. No palm-sized demons tracking us or telling us who to be. Sand. Sun. Free time and Free Bird. No likes. No followers. No shares. Real time. Analog. Conversations without abbreviations or acronyms. Spoken not typed. Love. Relationships. Heartbreak. Hormones. Naivety. Learning as we go without Siri, Alexa, or YouTube to help us. Is it better or is it worse? Public coming of age or private memories? These "stories" told in 2023... are they even the truth? I can't stop it. I can't change it. My boys are in it. Will they survive it like we did? Corona with a lime. 19, 20, 21 and a beach breeze. Music as the soundtrack to youth in the night. Some things remain true. Love and heartache. Friendship and comparison. The vigor and the pain of growing up. Goodnight sweet sunset. I see you in my rearview. Sweet Home on my Apple Car Play. Blue eyes smiling back at me.
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Bicycle lights, bicycle lights Riding with friends from the neighborhood after dark With the crisp spring air and the sounds of the night Getting that last lap in before bedtime My boys have those lights on their scooters and bikes And I wish they were around in my day But I recognize that feeling they give anyway It's a feeling we have all felt A Swagger; a JuJu A pep in our step and a smile from the rearview Remember being a kid? No worries, no stress No finances or relationships that need to be addressed I wish we, as adults, spent more time having fun and left more cleaning to wait more dishes undone If we all had bicycle lights and the feeling they give us We would dance more in the kitchen We would not be so serious We would tell those around us that we love them and that we need them We would sing and act silly Do you remember that freedom? Bicycle lights, bicycle lights Can I borrow you for a while? I need an hour of smiles and giggles I need the energy of a child I want the confidence of youth I ache for the ease of those years The innocence, the imagination Before all these doubts, hurts, and fears Let's go play in the neighborhood Until the street lights come on Let's soar on our bikes down a hill And remember where we came from I love Christmas. I know for some the holidays are hard. Very hard. And as I get older, they are harder for me too. But I still have that child-like wonder and love for the holiday season. And I hope by traveling this list with me, you'll find a little whimsy inside your soul too.
Laundry. Dishes. Kids' practices and rehearsals. Groceries. Oh, and don't forget the HOA. Where is the romance, right? Forget romance, where is the deeper connection? When is the last time he asked me about my dreams or my fears? Umm, when is the last time I asked him about anything other than a scheduling conflict or a honey-do checklist. When is the last time we touched each other out of sheer desire and not some scheduled meeting of 2 busy adults? When is the last time we laughed or cried together? Am I the only one who feels alone more than I ever thought I would as a married person? Truth is, NO. I am not alone in feeling alone! I know this based on the countless conversations I have had with my patients over the years. Marital disconnection literally sends people into their primary care provider's office with symptoms of depression, fatigue, anxiety, and sometimes even physical symptoms (nausea, rapid heart rate, the list goes on). You know how our kids nag us on weekends "mom, mom, mom- watch me do this. Look at this. I want to show you this." Well, the truth is that we want the same thing from our spouse and they want it from us. We just don't know how to express that need. So we pout. We give the silent treatment. We build an invisible wall to avoid rejection. And it is killing us. So How DO We Fix It? One exercise my husband and I use is the FANOS method for couples communication. It only takes a few minutes each day and it has been paramount in improving our daily conversations and overall understanding of each other. The way it works is that one partner goes through their FANOS while the other listens and does not comment. No fixing or feedback. Just active listening. Then it's the other partner's turn. There is a 24 hour rule on comments. Very important to honor the 24 hour rule. The acronym is as follows:
Feelings: use an emotion word and tell your partner how you are feeling. Give a brief synopsis as to why you are feeling that way. Acknowledgements: use this time to thank your partner for something he or she has done or is doing. This can be something you appreciate about them or an actual task. Needs: Let your partner know something you need from them. THIS ONE is the one the other partner often wants to give feedback on or fix, BUT no commentary for 24 hours. Ownership: Use this time to admit your screwups. Take ownership for that snarky comment or huffy attitude. This one has been so good for us! Struggles / sobriety: Let your partner know about something you are working on either for yourself or in the relationship. This is so good for accountability and vulnerability in the relationship. Quick caveat: the Needs section is the stickiest one for us. We have found that we don't want to list the same need over and over and make the other partner feel inadequate, so sometimes we list a need outside of the relationship. That may not be the proper way to FANOS, but it has worked for us and kept some pressure off. I hope this technique gives you a starting point for your relationship to head towards communication and understanding. Feeling seen and heard is imperative for a relationship's success. Not every day is going to be perfect. There WILL be bumps in the road. But having a partner that you trust to show up for you and at least TRY to hold space for you as you process difficult emotions is what matters most. Godspeed. Every year, we have a Cookie Decorating competition and an Ornament Decorating competition. The kids get super competitive and the husband and I simply enjoy all the time together as a family. We post pictures on Facebook and tally votes for the winners. In today's age of go-go-go and scroll-scroll-scroll, we cherish every minute of time together, unplugged, as a family. ❤️ Kids are out of school (or will be soon). "Mom, I'm bored." "Mom, I wanna do something fun." "Mom, let's do something for Christmas." If you've ever had a weekend or a school's-out-day full of hungry kids following you around the house telling you they're bored over and over again, I feel you!!! I have one out of the house and 2 still following me around on those days. This is a family tradition we created, in part, to fill some time and make some memories. Now it has become something we all love and look forward to every year. I keep acrylic paints on hand and I stock up on wooden ornaments at the after-Christmas sales for the next years' contest. Paint pens also come in handy and skinny Sharpies for those finer details. We usually post our ornaments on social media and allow friends and family to vote. I think we've had different prizes over the years, but mostly it's for bragging rights. Can you believe my then-9-year-old did the Frog all by himself? Rise and SHINE. Come rain or come SHINE. He took a SHINE to her. It's her GLOW UP. Bright, light, shimmery, polished. I don't know about you, but I am over all the SHINE. I want real. I want real conversations with real friends in real houses with real food. I want a real marriage with real connection and real love. I'm done with transactional. I want relational. I want physical touch and heart to heart dialogue. I don't want to talk about the weather or local gossip. I want to know what lights you up inside. What keeps you awake at night. I have been backwards and forwards, inside and outside the past few years. I think we all have with what the pandemic did to us. I don't want lip service. I want the truth. I will take that hard conversation over that placation any day. Is this shift in my mindset from midlife or from trauma or from growth? Am I bitter or intentional? Jaded or focused? I want to laugh too! I want to have fun! I want books and game nights and couch cuddles by the fire. I want to stay connected on social media and enrich my world with the vast resources available without feeling like dirt. Is it possible? Can I get on the Gram and laugh at the TikToks while still honoring my self-worth? I'm working on it. And what makes me so special to want all this? Or is this the way it was at one time before the SHINE? Does anyone even know? Even my elderly patients fall victim to hours on Facebook and subsequent feelings of loneliness and inadequacy. SHINE can be reserved for sports medals and awards shows, fancy nights out, and holiday decor. It has its place. It should be special and not everyday. Present over perfect. Real over fabulous. True over attractive. That's where you'll find me. Please support my fellow hope*writers by reading their work based on the prompt word SHINE.
It’s your time to shine! By Sharla Hallett www.sharlahallett.com/its-your-time-to-shine/ How To Overcome Adversity & Shine by Ashley Olivine https://ashleyolivine.com/overcome-adversity/ Shining Brightly in a Dark World by Dianne Vielhuber https://simplewordsoffaith.com/wp-admin/shining-brightly-in-a-dark-world/ Make this Advent Shine by Jessica Weaver http://rootedunrooted.com/blog/make-this-advent-shine Here are my FAVORITE things for November 2022:
I hope these gave you some good gift or snack or entertainment ideas! Life is short, so have fun! Godspeed my friends. Every year my family decorates pumpkins together. We started with the regular pumpkin carving kits but soon realized we wanted to get more creative. This has become a family tradition that we all look forward to and enjoy. When movies and trampoline parks are $10-$20 a person, a few $6 pumpkins and some basic acrylic paints and brushes (that have lasted for years and years) is cheap in comparison. We play our bluetooth speaker in the background and just enjoy the family time together. It's these times that create a sense of security and family for my boys. They have told me as much. 🥰
I hope this gets you excited for FALL and FAMILY time. If you don't do this regularly (or if you do),
let me know how you like it after you try it! Comment below- I love hearing from my readers. 🥰 I love a good puzzle! I don't want 1000 pieces, 500 is plenty for me. I don't want it all to be the same color either. I want lots of colors and a scene or image that brings me joy or peace. Give me a cheesy movie, some warm pajamas, a cup of coffee or hot tea, and a day off work, and I can sit at a puzzle table for hours. I love it even more when I'm sitting next to friends or family or if we each peck at the puzzle over a few days. Collaboration at its best! I love the fact that we can all be looking at the exact same pieces and patterns, but one person can "figure it out" when it has been right there in front of us the entire time. I also love that there are no electronics involved! Much like life, a puzzle teaches us that there are many ways to look at things. Patience is key. And teamwork makes the dream work. All the cliches really "fit" into working a jigsaw puzzle. ☀️
This particular puzzle was SO hard to finish! All those Star Wars uniforms tended to blend together. The kids started it with us but towards the end, my dad and I were the only ones pushing through to the finish line. Working puzzles with my dad hasbecome a favorite pastime for both of us. We can chat, or work in silence. That time with him has been a gift. Do you enjoy working puzzles? What does it do for you? I can't wait to hear all about your puzzle motivations in the comments below. I love interacting with my readers. For more of an inside look into my days, you can follow me on TikTok, Instagram, or Facebook.
Other ideas for rainy days with kids include:
Please check out the work of my fellow hope*writers: 10 Things I Learned While Waiting On God by Sharla Hallett https://sharlahallett.com/10-things-i-learned-while-waiting-on-god/ The Ten Lepers - A Lesson in Thankfulness by Lisa Granger https://lisamarcelina.net/the-ten-lepers---a-lesson-in-thankfulness/ Never Travel Without These Ten Things by Jessica Weaver www.rootedunrooted.com/blog/never-travel-without-these-ten-things 10 Ways to Turn Things Around by Ashley Olivine https://www.ashleyolivine.com/how-to-turn-things-around/ When Emotional or Mental Pain Is a 10 by Dianne Vielhuber https://simplewordsoffaith.com/2022/09/01/when-emotional-or-mental-pain-is-a-10/ I have been packing for the beach for over 20 years now. I certainly was not as pack-savvy my first 5-10 trips as I am now. These are my BEST TIPS for beach packing if you are driving to the beach.
see list of supplies I keep year-round in my cabin / beach box ⬆️⬆️⬆️ Beach Food / Condo List:
Beach clothes / other necessities list:
What goes in our cooler(s) for the ride to the beach:
What we buy once we are there:
I'm typing this from Orange Beach.
I hope you found these lists inclusive and helpful. May all your beach trips be smooth sailing. 🏖 Godspeed. It's summer. In Georgia. So it's HOT. And one thing I'm learning about these long, hot days is that being inside in the cool AC with a fan whirring in the background and nature showing off outside my window gives me both energy and rest simultaneously. Yes, the kids are out of school. Yes, there are lots of "mom, I'm bored" whines followed almost immediately by "mom, I'm hungry." But there is something about summer that makes us all kids again, isn't there? We stay up later than we should. We eat popcorn for dinner if we want to eat popcorn for dinner. We "don't have any homework" and most of us "don't have practice" and a messy house is expected with kids out of school. Pools call our names and floating counts as exercise. Ice cream outings beckon us to sidewalks in small towns. A live band on a starlit night with a warm breeze gives me enough wattage to survive this Georgia heat and sink into my sheets at night both tired and invigorated. We talk to our neighbors more. The same ones we see all year walking their dogs. But it's summer. And summer gives us permission to interact even in this lonely digital world. Movies are cast on campers and garage doors. Glow sticks compete with fireflies and fireworks happen a few times each summer- all over the world. Smores become dessert and even church seems more fun in the summer. God must be showing off a little more with these summer rules and nature's beauty on display. Books are suddenly important to moms and sometimes even dads. And not books for the kids, books for US. We suddenly want to read... by the pool, at the lake, on the beach. Clothing is thinner and shorter so even laundry is less cruel and mundane. Work is necessary for most of us, but even WORK in the summer is better. Frankly we are all in a better mood. So I ask you to sit for a minute or two and consider all the things you LOVE about summer. There is so much going on in the world this June of 2022, that I chose to focus on any summer, all summers, just summer for my reflection post. Life has been heavy, but I need light. We head to the beach in a few weeks and my children's' excitement is like a drug. They giggle and ramble on about all the things we will do and how fun it will be. And I join in! Because I was 10 years old one time, without a bank account or work deadline or relationship issue to worry about. I was 10 years old. Out of school. Staying up late. And catching fireflies after I rode my bike and jumped in the pool with my friends. Allow yourself to be 10 years old today. The world needs that right now. Godspeed. How are you? Good, how are you? Fine, today was busy. Yeah, me too. Ready for some downtime. Did you go by the drugstore? I did (even though he could have). Did you run the dishwasher? I did (even though she could have). What's going on this weekend? A Saturday-Sunday tournament and I really need to get some of my charts done. (He didn't ask if I wanted to do anything as a couple. I guess he doesn't care). (She is always working- she never even mentioned anything I might want or need). Okay- sounds good. Sound familiar? We both have needs, but we are not making them known. We both have resentment, but we speak like polite coworkers. The conversations are transactional and not RELATIONAL. We are co-parenting and room-mating - but where is the love? Unfortunately, as the years passed and the kids got older, we seemed to have fewer transactional conversations. Homework wasn't AS MUCH of a chore. Snacks were often handled by the kids independently. Routines were established and roles were pretty defined (though unspoken) in the home. In ways, this meant less bickering and smoother mornings and evenings, but were we connected? OR were we just 2 lonely adults passing in the hallway - each longing for a real connection but not knowing where to start? We have both been married before, so we both know the pain of divorce. We vowed to make this marriage work, but was it working? Was it tolerable or was it phenomenal? I have been going to THE BEST counselor on the planet for about 18 months now, and I asked her for a few suggestions. Regardless of each person's love language, she made clear that time and non-sexual touch are both very necessary for meaningful connection. Since I work days and my husband works nights, we don't have a TON of time together - and very rarely is it without children. We both commute so that takes away even more of our precious time. The kids are busy year-round it seems, so where was I supposed to carve out both TIME and TOUCH? I decided that we needed ONE HOUR per day to talk, sit close to each other, and just be together. I named it the POWER HOUR and I told the kids this was Mom and Dad's time together and it should not be interrupted unless there is an emergency. They heard "screen time" and were all for it. I decided kids' screen time is worth the investment in our marriage. I claimed 7-8 pm to be our ONE HOUR per day to sit on the couch together - touching!- to watch TV, chat, whatever. I am not gonna lie, 9 times out of 10 my feet and legs are in his lap and he's using my massage gun on my calves while I scratch his non-massage-gun-holding arm and hand. He likes scratches, I like massages. The point is, though, that we are touching and there is no pressure surrounding the touch. All adults everywhere know what I mean by that. He has to leave for work by 8 pm, so once he leaves I call the kids back into the living room and we finish out our family time before bed. If he's off that night then we may continue past 8 pm. The rules are simple: he needs to be showered and ready for work by 7 not 8 so I can have that hour with him. I need to ignore work and personal messages during that precious hour so that I can give him my undivided attention. Sometimes there is a late practice or rehearsal and our POWER HOUR is skipped or delayed, but it is a daily priority now. We both look forward to that time together, and the kids are still alive. It is so much easier to hash out a BIG issue when you are sitting next to your spouse touching them instead of over the phone or (worse) text. If you are both relaxed and physically touching each other, it is harder to become defensive or to go into attack mode. A quick squeeze of the arm or hand can reassure your partner that you are, in fact, on the same team. Close eye contact can remind your spouse that you love them and that you each have the same end goals. You may read this and be thanking the heavens that you've never felt disconnected from your spouse. Having worked with married patients for years, I would venture to guess you'd be in the minority. I know most of us have felt like our marriages have become mundane or on auto-pilot at various times. It doesn't necessarily take a marriage retreat or some crazy new "trick" to get your marriage back on track. For us, it just took a shared couch, one hour per day, and our hands. It took putting the phone down. It took managing our time to preserve that one hour per day. It took biting our tongues when we wanted to be snappy and waiting until we were together to have that hard conversation.
My life isn't perfect nor is my marriage. My house isn't perfect. My kids are not perfect. I am far from perfect. But, I am trying. He is trying. We are trying. Effort is attractive and kindness matters. Godspeed. During the Summer of 2021, we took our rising 6th and 4th grader to Alabama Adventure Amusement Park in Birmingham, AL. We had watched a few YouTube reviews of the park and read what precautions they were taking for the pandemic. Since I am immunocompromised, we decided to rent a cabana for the entire day just for a little extra precaution. The price for the cabana was TOTALLY worth the money! We plan to go back and rent one again!
We love the Rec Room open concept with the Kitchen sink, full-size refrigerator, pantry (with microwave), table for 6. We now have a coffee pot and a toaster down there for guests or for us. When our oldest comes home from the Air Force, he often brings the air fryer down there for snacks. Husband is refinishing a 100 year old pool table that is parallel to the kitchen table. Husband did all the framing, wiring, plumbing, insulation, cabinet installation, lighting, and tiled the shower in the bathroom and the backsplash in the craft room. He installed the butcher block countertops in the kitchen area and in my craft room. We subbed out the HVAC, floors, drywall, paint, and trim.
The guest bedroom is huge and we now have a daybed and treadmill in there. I can even set up a full-size folding table for Christmas wrapping or other projects. It's perfect for a family with small children and our oldest loves the privacy when he comes home.
Part of the reason I keep a planner is because my memory is terrible. Just ask my best friend since third grade. I blame it on nursing and NP school and having to memorize so many drugs and diseases. I also blame it on having lived in four states and meeting several "sets of people" in my lifetime. Anyway, when I sit down to start my year end review, I grab my planner. I repress memories which I am working on in therapy, but I really can’t remember what happened the past year without flipping through each month and glancing at big moments. I am not exactly sure why my brain is like that, but it is and yours may be too? Sometimes my mind is blown when I look at everything that happened in my personal or professional or emotional life in one calendar year. How do we survive with the pace and the demands of the world today? When is enough enough? Everyone I know feels like they’re drowning with all the work deadlines, projects, meetings, kids' activities, sports, and that's not even accounting for the emotional toll the past 2 years have taken on every single one of us. When I look back over 2021 in my own life, the following events come to light:
As I look back over the events of 2021, it often sparks me to plan and reserve trips or experiences for 2022. My manager also loves that I give her my days off for the entire year in December or January. I realize you might not be able to do this, but it actually reduces my anxiety knowing in January when I will be off throughout the year. If I am having an extremely stressful season / week / month, I already know the upcoming days of rest that are scheduled. My patients appreciate it too... less moving and rearranging (sorry for those reading this- 2021 was rough on my schedule!). 🤪 Sitting down and performing a yearly review also gives me reassurance or reminders of certain events I do NOT want to attend or participate in again. It helps me to identify what was life-giving and what was life-draining. That clarity is HUGE. You'll notice I did not list the following (but they all also happened): hurt feelings, miscommunication, personal growth, continued grief, strained conversations, burnout, apathy, frustration, disdain, regret, fear, hopelessness, anger, and anxiety. While I am not listing those publicly, they are named on my heart and mind. Thanks to counseling, I am trying not to wear them inside my body (The Body Keeps The Score by Bessel Van Der Kolk, MD). I am intentionally working to process and let go as I go instead of swallowing or shoving it down, or worse- spewing it out. This is hard work. This is a big deal. So I encourage you as we wrap up 2021 and enter 2022, to sit down and block off a good 30 minutes to yourself. Scroll through your planner or your Google Calendar or your Facebook pictures and think about the past 12 months. What felt good? What felt icky? Who gave you energy when you were around them? Who made you feel bad about yourself? What habits added to your life? What subtracted? Look at your screen time averages on your phone. Maybe set a goal to lower those. A fellow blogger in my writer's group wrote a piece about our children remembering us looking at our phones instead of looking at their faces. LET THAT SINK IN FOR A MINUTE. I may write a piece about goal-setting and planning for the year ahead, but I would be a sham if I told you I set any goals for 2021. I didn't even know I would start writing this year. This nudge just got so big in July that I just started (oh yeah, I forgot our trip to Birmingham this summer). I was in a hotel room in Birmingham with keyed-up pre-teens, a snoring husband (love you babe), and a laptop staring at me. I had to process all this STUFF and it just started. So just start. Even if you only take the next 2-5 minutes to reflect on 2021. I beg of you to do it. So many of us are just sleepwalking through life. Work. Supper. Kids. TV. Bed. Repeat. Weekend. And repeat again. Let us all try some self-evaluation, life-evaluation, emotional-evaluation. What is life-giving and what is life-draining? What brings you joy? The only person keeping me from writing was ME. What will YOU allow yourself to do in 2022? Godspeed. For working adults, the holidays can be a time of stress or lightheartedness. A time of fun or overwhelm. For many of us, holidays are a mixture of all 4 emotions. Since healthcare is the only field I have ever worked in, I do not have a huge frame of reference for employee appreciation during the holidays. I have not seen what corporate America or the education fields do to raise morale. I do know my teacher friends tell me "education goes out the window" those last few days or weeks of school since all of the children are mentally riding the Polar Express to Christmas Break. In healthcare, door decorating or nurses' station decorating contests are quite common and can add some cheer to our days of patient care, refills, and charting deadlines. Patients and staff seem to enjoy the whimsy of the holidays. Honestly, I wish we could decorate year-round just to keep things fresh! How does your employer boost morale for the holidays? Are staff members invited to join in certain festivities? Do employees receive a gift card or cash bonus? Does someone host a holiday party? Christmas carols? Is there a community service event your employer gets behind during the holidays? What about a local Christmas parade? Does your employer sponsor and decorate a float? Do you have to work the holidays? What has made you feel valued and appreciated by your employer during the holidays? Has administration ever asked you? I would love to continue the conversation in the comment section below, or you can always follow me on TikTok, Instagram, or Facebook. I love interacting with my readers! We all have basic human needs as individuals. Most of us would agree that we need food, sleep, and water and some agree we need love and friendship. I would venture to guess that beyond those basic needs, many people are sleep-walking through life without ever giving pause to what THEY or WE actually need from each other. Lots of therapy has helped me realize that other people in my life don't automatically KNOW what I need or expect from them. I must let them know what I need. I have also come to realize that no ONE person in my life could possibly fill or meet all of my needs. It is humanly impossible to meet all the needs of another human by oneself. It truly does take a village. Once we have identified our needs, we can start to look at the players on our team and realize who is filling which need in our life. Some fill multiple needs. Others fill one need or don't fill a need at all, but instead may be causing stress or toxicity. Perhaps "trimming the fat" is in order when it comes to our circle of loved ones. I have also learned that not all of us are CAPABLE or WILLING to meet certain needs of others, and that too can be a painful process of acceptance and growth. So, let's roll up our sleeves and look closely at the basic human needs of each person roaming around this earth. Let us make a list of the members of our circle and try to identify who fills which need(s). There are several reasons this is important:
This is real adulting. Grown up stuff. Hard stuff. Deep stuff. So get ready. photo credit: childhoodtraumarecovery.com Let us look at Maslow's hierarchy of needs from a current-day real-life perspective and add the context of relationships and connection to those needs:
I don't have many patients that walk into my office and tell me they have needs. Instead, they tell me they are sad. They are withdrawing from friends or family. They can't sleep. They don't feel good. The have mood swings or anger outbursts. They are no longer excited about life. Medication cannot "fix" some of these painful circumstances we are all facing in our lives. An SSRI (most commonly used class of anti-depressants) cannot make your spouse SEE you or try to meet your needs. It cannot heal decade-old wounds from your narcissistic mother. It cannot jump into your best friend's mind and tell her that she is hurting you with her words or actions. Nor can it walk into your adult child's house and announce that YOU are a person, too, and that you need love and respect. So many of these issues have been around so long in your life that you don't know where to begin to address them. I encourage you to seek counseling if and when you can. A good therapist really can change your life. In the meantime, write down YOUR needs. List what needs are being met and which are not being met. Jot down WHO is helping to meet those needs and make a mental note of who you really can count on in which needs department. Use your resources - your people - when you are in crisis. Learn to NOT go to the ones who have not or cannot meet certain needs so that you avoid further hurt and disappointment. And consider having a conversation with your loved one if the opportunity ever arises and the setting and timing are conducive to growth. We cannot read minds, and we are all flawed. This relationship and self-evaluation work isn't easy, but it is worth it. Godspeed.
State Prints from Jane- White on White Frames from Amazon These are the 4 states in which I've lived!
LUG Switch crossbody bag - came with free phone holder that you can touch through (though I haven't tried it) and it has that RFID technology that keeps people from scanning your card #s. Ya'll, this was my first ever QVC purchase and I am 45 years old. I love, love, love the bag though for shopping as it's the perfect size for my small LUG Splits Wallet (got it from amazon- will link on my tools page), my phone, keys, lipstick, coupons, mask, and hand sanitizer. I think the QVC chic showed it worn as a fanny pack also, but I haven't been to Disney since I got it. :-). I know I paid under $50, but I would have to look back at the exact price. I can't find the exact one on Amazon but I linked one very similar in my "tools" page. This bag is still available on the QVC site but the colors are very limited. 👀
I grew up in a family that plays games. My father's family played Rook and Dominos. My mother's mother and her husband loved to play Uno and Skip-Bo with me. My childhood friend and I could then and now beat anybody anywhere in Spades (name the date and time, we will be there). In my first marriage, we hosted game nights pretty regularly since we did not have children and we actually had some free time on weekends. Since moving to Georgia, I have hosted several Girls Nights involving games and a ton of laughter. I can quote some of the crazy things my friends have said from those nights, and I will never regret playing a game with people I love. Playing games makes us feel connected, engaged, and let's face it - COMPETITIVE. In 2021, our kids don't know a ton about winning and losing. Participation trophies are the norm and handling a loss is not a daily challenge. I even work in a county where a ZERO cannot be given by a teacher even if the child doesn't write a single stroke of pencil on the page. A SIXTY is the lowest grade that can be given. WHAT are we teaching our next generation? I am the first to admit that not only am I competitive, but I can get carried away. This has improved with each life decade, and I'm now teaching my kids how to win and lose. We love to play the board game Aggravation and now that they are old enough, we have introduced Taboo, The Five Second Rule, Charades, Mafia, Pictionary, Scrabble, Monopoly, and many more. Along the way, I have created games that we can play at the table during family meals OR on a roadtrip. I have no idea if I am the only one on the planet who created these, so I am not calling copyright and you are more than welcome to use them. I think I made them up, but I am certain I did not. I encourage you to try these with your family. Make sure devices are far away and HAVE FUN!
Anyway, now that you have 5 tried-and-true "invisible" (no prop) games you can play with your family or friends while on a roadtrip or sharing a meal, I encourage you to try it!
Start today! Let me know which ones you loved or hated and leave a comment with any "invisible" games you might play with your family. Cool mornings and crisp evenings. Nice breeze in the air. Green grass, fall multi-colored leaves in the southern oak trees, and the smell of beer, bourbon, burgers, and barbecue surrounds us. Young collegiates in love (or at least like), families with little boys in tiny replica jerseys and little girls in tiny replica cheerleading uniforms, and everyone who likes a good time is invited. Grown men with radio broadcasts on headsets (because watching it live and in person isn't quite enough), decorated RVs with big screen TVs streaming games all day, and the occasional first-timer... jaw agape, taking it all in. I was one of the lucky ones. I got to to witness this glory every other weekend (or so) for four fall seasons in a row as a student, with a cheap ticket in an amazing seat. Those were the days. If you are a grown adult with a family or at least a job that offers a 401k, this is what you need to know (if you're an SEC football tailgate first-timer about to witness the good stuff):
Let's take a deeper dive into each one of these tips:
Now that you know what to bring and have some idea of what to expect, please remember to inhale a few deep breaths of that bourbon-infused fresh air and take in the atmosphere.
Look at all the young couples in love, families having fun, and older college friends reuniting for a Saturday tradition. Listen to the drumline of the band, watch the dance team and cheerleaders shake their hips, and feel the excitement in the thousands of people walking the same direction at the same time to witness a good old-fashioned football game. There are a few other ways I like to spend my Saturdays, but this may be #1. Enjoy, my friend.
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